Man of the people, Governor Tom Corbett, was quoted in our local paper as suggesting that one significant reason the unemployment rate in Pennsylvania was lagging the nation was that people were not applying for jobs because they would fail the mandatory drug test. Tom went on to say: Read more »

Stevieslaw: The War on the Disorganized

Forget the war on Christmas.  The war so many of us have to pay attention to is the war on the disorganized.  Here at Stevieslaw, our former employer, The Penn State University, has decided to reduce its health care costs by rooting out the people who are claiming health benefits for dependents who aren’t.  My guess is that there are less than a half a dozen people that fall into that category.  No matter. To handle the task, dear old state has hired a company---probably at a cost of some umpteen million or so.  Dear old State!

I have to prove that I am married---by presenting to a web site, or faxing, or mailing a copy (or perhaps an original) of our marriage certificate and an income tax filing from the last two years.  Organized people, who have their documents filed neatly by subject, date and color of paper, can do this in about eleven seconds.  Disorganized people must allow at least 4000 hours for the task.  Karen and I were married in 1969.  Do you have my marriage certificate? Neither do I.  My computer---the one that had all of my income tax stuff crashed recently.  Do you have my returns? Me neither.   Read more »

Stevieslaw: Fox News Trumpets an “I Told You So!”

Fox News’ Medical Experts are citing a recent report that shows American men have the lowest life expectancy and American women the second lowest among 17 developed nations as evidence of the dramatic failure of Obamacare.  Fox medical spokesperson, Iggy B. Moth, said in an interview with our own Smokey Diamond, “As we predicted, Obamacare has been a terrible catastrophe for the nation.”  “We have gone from having the best health care in the world---hands down---as we reported last year during the Presidential campaign, to the worst, in just the little more than six months since the Supreme Court approved Obamacare.”

Our usually respectful Smokey Diamond felt forced to point out that, “the authors of the study suggest that violence, particularly gun violence, and obesity were driving factors for the lower life expectancy in America.” “Moreover,” continued Smokey, “The study was retroactively based on statistics from the late 1990s through 2008.”   

“Someone should do a book on lame liberal excuses,” responded Moth.  “You America hating liberal fascists are never willing to take responsibility for anything,” he concluded with a Fox flourish. 

Stevieslaw: No Accusation

Governor Romney, speaking at a campaign stop in Florida said today “I am not accusing President Obama of conspiring with climate scientists to construct this devastating hurricane, no matter what other smart and rational people are saying. Fair and Balanced News also stopped short of accusing the President. They did note, however, that the storm was “much too late in the season” and that “its shape reminded them of a map of Kenya.”  Two of the Superpacs, somehow associated with Mitt, did run the story.  When questioned, they would only say, “Of course it’s not true---so what?”

Stevieslaw: Mitt no More

“You won’t have Mitt to kick around anymore,” opined Smokey Diamond, our ace reporter.  “The word on the street is he is changing his name from Mitt to Franklin Delano Romney.”

We turned on the TV just in time to catch the end of the ceremony on Fair and Balanced.  Franklin Delano Romney waxed eloquently on just what Roosevelt and the New Deal had meant to him when he was growing up in a cold-water flat in Toledo, Ohio.  After, he hugged Bernie Sanders, the left leaning Senator from Vermont, and said Bernie was his “new best bud.”

Paul Ryan, who is apparently still severely conservative would only say, “I will be at the gym.”  “I will be pounding things at the gym--- pounding them bloody, for the next few weeks.”