It seems that at least once a week our local newspaper, The Centre Daily Times, treats us to an article about the six “w’s” of the gun law. Today it was, “Leaders debate guns in parks.” We would like the gun lobby to know that we will do anything not to see another senseless article on gun control. Our hands are up. Don’t shoot.
Take your Glock wherever you like. Take it to school, just in case the teacher assigns too much homework or the kid in the next row “disrespects” you. Bring it to church, in case you are attacked by a rival denomination. Take it to the movie theatre, in case the villains leave the screen and wander through the audience looking for victims. Take it to the supermarket, in case you need to defend the ten items or less check-out line. Take it to the park, in case Smokey the Bear mouths off about fire safety. Take it to the bathroom, in case you are constipated. Take it to make love, in case you need backup. And remember to take it to heaven, in case you need to defend your cloud—‘cause who the hell knows how up to date St. Peter’s terrorist check list is.