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No Accusation

Stevieslaw: No Accusation

Governor Romney, speaking at a campaign stop in Florida said today “I am not accusing President Obama of conspiring with climate scientists to construct this devastating hurricane, no matter what other smart and rational people are saying. Fair and Balanced News also stopped short of accusing the President. They did note, however, that the storm was “much too late in the season” and that “its shape reminded them of a map of Kenya.”  Two of the Superpacs, somehow associated with Mitt, did run the story.  When questioned, they would only say, “Of course it’s not true---so what?”

Ahead of the Curve


At 7 AM today, Governor Romney lambasted President Obama for the “truly terrible job he has done in executing the emergency response in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.”   “In a Romney administration,” he intoned, “You can expect the difficult work of cleaning up from the devastation of any national disaster will be finished by the time the disaster occurs.”  “Anything less i a dereliction of duty.”

MItt no More

Stevieslaw: Mitt no More

“You won’t have Mitt to kick around anymore,” opined Smokey Diamond, our ace reporter.  “The word on the street is he is changing his name from Mitt to Franklin Delano Romney.”

We turned on the TV just in time to catch the end of the ceremony on Fair and Balanced.  Franklin Delano Romney waxed eloquently on just what Roosevelt and the New Deal had meant to him when he was growing up in a cold-water flat in Toledo, Ohio.  After, he hugged Bernie Sanders, the left leaning Senator from Vermont, and said Bernie was his “new best bud.”

Paul Ryan, who is apparently still severely conservative would only say, “I will be at the gym.”  “I will be pounding things at the gym--- pounding them bloody, for the next few weeks.”


Tracking the Candidates

Stevieslaw: Tracking the Candidates

Smokey Diamond, our usually unflappable ace reporter, went catatonic after the first debate.  She is recovered and will be closely following the Republican candidates daily, until Election Day, which Republicans in Ohio are now telling everyone is December 7th.

Today, Romney continued his foreign policy blitz by telling a roaring crowd in Miami that, “If only I had been President during the Cuban missile crisis, rather than that weak-kneed John Kennedy, we could have avoided a nuclear war.”

The RNC, reported today at 9 AM, that Paul Ryan had driven a municipal garbage truck through Toledo, Ohio.  Ryan, breakfasting after at the popular “Grits and Chips” restaurant, told a cheering crowd that he was proud to be a Teamster. 

The RNC spokesperson, RU Kidgme, later admitted that it wasn’t a real garbage truck Ryan was not a Teamster, and that, in fact, Ryan was in Sarasota.  When pressed, Kidgme would only say, “It’s pressure time and hard to keep track of every little this and that.”

Herbal Tea

Stevieslaw: Herbal Tea

I hadn’t seen Arnold Slanzky in years.  The last I had heard he was working toward a doctorate in Public Health with a thesis that purported to show that the pets of the top 1% had much better access to health care than did Americans earning less than $50,000 a year.  They had generally better outcomes as well.

I was surprised to see then, as Smokey and I drove through Southern Ohio, Arnie’s picture plastered on billboards every few miles.  It had his portrait---a smiling face on a balding head---with the boldly lettered statement, “Throw off the Yolk of Big Government.”  My old ultra-liberal friend Arnie was apparently running for Congress as a Tea Party Candidate with bad spelling.

We gave him a call and got to meet him for lunch at the local Dennys---his new favorite restaurant.  After we had caught up a bit, I asked him about his candidacy. 

“I was teaching and doing some research at a University,“ he said. Read more »

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